


Dandelion [OS]

by Lu_Bacon



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-23
Updated: 2020-09-23
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:20:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26615116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lu_Bacon/pseuds/Lu_Bacon
Summary: "This cold and empty roomThat was closed for so longYour scent that gently carried over in the airUnknowingly, my heart fluttered because of it"You Never Know - ChenIt was his last letter, his last words, for this special person that Luhan was to him...[HunHan | OS]
Relationships: Lu Han/Oh Sehun
Kudos: 4





	Dandelion [OS]

I am still writing to you today. Just like my previous letters, you will never receive it, but... it has to come out. And by doing this, the words I put down on paper leave my mind and I can fall asleep more peacefully, without them coming back to haunt me during the few hours I can sleep.

I have always thought, since we met, naively, I grant you, that we were soul mates. Even though we had just met, everything seemed so easy with you... You understood me without any difficulty, I didn't need to pretend to be someone else like with the others. You knew who I was, without me even telling you anything...  
We had a lot in common too, remember? How many times did the other members remark that when we were together, we were in a bubble? A bubble where no one else but us could be there, which annoyed them a lot, but made us smile.  
I loved those moments we spent together, talking about everything and nothing, doing different activities, or when we went for a walk without the others... It was those moments that I preferred. Going off to discover the world with you is what I wanted more than anything else...   
We had such a connection that when we spoke together, or with others, it was not uncommon for us to say the same thing, when one didn't finish the other's sentence.   
It all comes back to me as I write to you... Innumerable memories come back to me and seem to flash before my eyes as if to taunt me. Tears come to border my eyes, but I know that you will never again come and take me in your arms to erase my sadness, that you will never again gently caress my hair until my anxieties disappear and I fall asleep. No. I don't have the right to do all that anymore, and it hurts me so badly, so badly Han... 

  
Like an idiot, I thought that ... since you were my soul mate, we would never be separated, that I would never lose you. But where was it written that soul mates were never separated? On the contrary, on the contrary, they are more often separated than together. 

Do you think that if I had seen that the thread was weakening between us, I could have done something about it? I never wanted to lose you, yet... that's what happened. I lost you, Luhan, before I lost myself...   
Since then, I feel like time is stretching, distorting itself... making me lose the little landmark I had left since your loss. I can't take a step in front of each other without stumbling... constantly scratching my skin that was once free of scars...   
The others try to help me, to reach me, but how could they do that when I don't know where I am myself? Am I still in this body that writes to you? Or do I just feel like it? Things are so difficult since we are no longer together... 

I am constantly told that everything will get better with time, that it can heal everything, but I honestly doubt it. Of course, a broken vase can be glued back together, but... we both know that the vase will not be the same, that some fragments will be missing, even if they are invisible to the naked eye. The vase will be easier to break again and the next time, when we want to glue it again, the cracks will be bigger...   
I don't know if you understand what I mean but... I don't want to be that vase. I don't want to be glued back together again. I just... want to be left alone. I want to be left with my broken pieces.  
  
Luhan, the little time we spent together was... I don't even have the words to express it. Was it happiness, which we all seek? Was it much more than that? I could never know what you think about it... But you know, I am extremely grateful to you for sharing my life during these few years. I have never felt more alive than when I was in your presence. 

Your scent, like a soft breeze, can be felt in this room that we had shared countless times until your disappearance but that I had not opened until today... I can feel my heart beating strongly, in my chest, as if it knows that you are here, that you are waiting for us, and that it wants to join you... It is almost painful. But... this pain is nothing compared to the pain I felt after losing you. I feel alive again and I've never been as close to death as I am now... 

**I love you Luhan. I hope that we will meet again one day and that the thread will link us together again, just like before...**


End file.
